She Said... Yes!


My friend Mindy from Denver sent me an email 3 days ago about the Fairy Tale that she is having at the moment.
In that email was a piece of important information saying that the man of his dreams had popped the question and ask her to marry her…. and she said YES!

They have been in-and-out of a relationship for more than 4 years but they finally decided to tie the knot. I was thrilled to hear the exciting news that I video called her at WhatsApp and submit her my congratulations & best wishes.
But during the middle of our conversation and pleasantries, I can sense some uneasiness and anxiety from my friend. I initially thought that Mindy was just having “Cold Feet” just like most people who are about to get married.
But the tone that I was hearing from her bothered me. I can feel some sadness in her.

Is everything okay Mindy? I asked. Then I repeated that same question again.
After a long pause, Mindy said this… I really don’t know Francis. I love my fiance. He is handsome, smart, responsible and has an amazing career.
He’s so sweet, gives me all the stuff that I want and bought me this “Diamond Ring”! But why is it I feel that there is something missing?

I responded by cautiously saying… I don’t know Mindy. You’re asking the wrong person. I am not “Dr. Love” that you can ask for advice from.

Then, I just remembered that the guy that he is marrying is 20 years older than her. While Mindy is in her early 20’s.
Although the age factor is not a big factor these days, clearly it was to these couples. The guy is in his 40’s who wants to settle down, have kids, and do Netflix marathon on the weekends.
Whereas Mindy is still in her energetic 20’s, craving nightly alcohol shenanigans and overrun live bands. And on the weekends she does skiing and hiking up in the mountains.

By not having to solve the dilemma that Mindy is undergoing. I changed the topic of our discussion and I asked how her Mom and her dog was doing.
I told her I’ll call back in a week or two and that was the end of it.

I don’t know if it is just me, but I am really impressed with women nowadays.
They are now more skilled and talented. They are more career oriented. And still remain beautiful as ever.
They don’t jump to conclusions and they reaffirm whenever they had to do a big decision in their life (just like Mindy’s).
Women are not only “Thinkers” in our society but also “Doers”, thus making our life with them much much better.

You might be surprised but 50% of married couples in the United States divorce. There is one divorce approximately every 36 seconds. That’s nearly 2,400 divorces per day, 16,800 divorces per week and 876,000 divorces a year.
And those are just the declared ones. They are a lot of unhappy couples forced to live together just for the sake of their kids well being.
A statistic that I hope will strikingly improve with the new generation.

I’m sure when I call back Mindy (or vice versa), I presumably still don’t have an answer to her question. Cleary, both of us have different case and scenarios that should be treated separately.
I guess the only advice that I can give to my American friend is to be “True to Herself”! Look deep into her feelings and follow her heart.
It’s either she gives the guy a chance or delay the wedding. There are lots of possible options to consider but the final decision will only be hers.

You just got to believe in love. There is no such thing as a Perfect Marriage or the Perfect Guy. There is not even a Perfect Life.

But if you are living in a Realistic Marriage with a Realistic Guy on a Realistic Life. And you are overly grateful and content with that.
Then I say that you have found that Diamond Ring that says Forever.
A forever feeling like love is surrounded all around you and you receive it every single day.
It’s definitely a Diamond Ring that everybody will say YES to!

Written on April 5, 2019