My Birthday's Won't Be The Same


Tomorrow is my birthday!
December 1 to some people is about “World AIDS Day”. Some are feeling excited because it’s the first day of Christmas month.
But tomorrow, I’ll be giving more attention to another more special occasion… the day my Youngest Sister passed away.

When I was young, it was all about receiving gifts and goodies. As I grew older, it turned to parties, booze, and yes more parties.
But since last year, I had a different perspective on celebrating my birthday.
Although, I will be celebrating my birthday with my loved ones, close relatives and friends… deep inside, I’ll be reminiscing the life of my sister.
She died at an early age of 26. We never got the chance to see her full potential using her skills and talents. Her angelic singing voice, her baking skills, and the “Cheeky Bone” smile that melts everybody’s heart.

To those who are not aware, my sister Roberta Marie Martinez, was an accident. She is not planned to be born in this world.
My Mom was past her prime and to her to get pregnant again will be critically dangerous. But somehow, Roberta managed to sneak into our arms.
For the past 26 years, she was our “Singing Doll”, amusing and delighting our guests whenever we have occasions at home which is unusually frequent.

Being the “Bunso” or youngest of the siblings, my sister always gets the biggest share of the pie.
I don’t mind!
In fact, I was one of them who spoils her enormously. Bringing her to Enchanted Kingdom and Louie’s THX Cinema most of the time.
Buying her Bratz dolls collecter’s edition and obeying her request to fill our aquarium with Goldfish 2 to 3 times a week (she kills them by some unknown reason).
Roberta was loved by everybody in the family. And she loved each and every one of us. My sister’s influence was greatly felt by everyone. But what is more impressive later in her lifetime was how she became close to a bunch of different groups which to most is impossible to overcome.

Roberta is very important in my life… and her life was cut short drastically. People say that we have to move on with our lives but how can you proceed when you lose somebody that is so dear to you? You can keep going… I’m aware of that. But the “Pain will always Remain”.
It’s like a deep hole in your heart that stays with you forever. I think everybody from all parts of the world will never get used to it… the dreaded “Death and Loss”!

Tomorrow, I will be receiving birthday greetings. And I will celebrate it with them.
After all, a birthday signifies your beginning and the joy of life.
It is an important and momentous occasion not to be understated. It is a time to celebrate, reflect and give thanks.

But the bigger question for me is “What contribution do I have in my birth”?
My sister Roberta, without a doubt, made a big contribution to her lifetime. That is exactly how I am going to treat my birthday tomorrow until the day I die.
Commemorating the life of my sister and putting in action on what can I do significantly in my lifetime.
I have to use more of my skills and talents. I should voluntarily contribute more to this world. And learn to be selfish for a change and enjoy life every minute and every hour.

My Life and Birthdays won’t ever be the same again. My outlook is totally different.
That changed when my sister showed up in my dreams and advised me this…
“One Life, No Regrets”!

I will always love you, my Dearest Sister! You will always be my Inspiration!

P.S. => I will never be as good as you, but lately I’ve been practicing the Ukulele hoping to inspire people with our charming music!

Written on November 30, 2018